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alexander-of-caledon:

astockdoveisacompactpigeon:

@alexander-of-caledon @underground-reality mind the cat that got crushed by the flat pack furniture 

for those tuning in at home: Texas the Psychic Horse is a mainstay of Take a Break: Fate and Fortune, a magazine which I used to buy and read religiously cos it has amazing stuff like this. true to his epithet, texas is a horse gifted with vaguely-defined psychic powers, who people write into for advice about their animals and pets. for some reason that’s never made clear, texas knows a lot about pet-based parapsychology, can communicate with his owner to convey this information, and has dedicated himself to using his talents to cheer up pet owners with subscriptions to a magazine that has previously also offered advice on getting transcendental heavenly beings to help you get out of bed on monday mornings and how one woman’s washing machine was a PORTAL TO HELL (blurry picture with an out-of-focus digital camera strap circled in RED with an ARROW and the word DIABOLICAL! beside it here)

(tw: animals getting hurt ahead)

the story that @astockdoveisacompactpigeon mentions is of a woman who wrote in saying (paraphrasing, bc i was in fits of laughter and only remember this incident as a burning light of pure bliss), “Dear Texas, I had a cat who was a boisterous and happy wee thing - until I accidentally let him get crushed to death by some flat-pack furniture I had kicking about my home. Please can you tell me if he’s angry with me, and did it hurt when Splattercat got cunted by a Billy bookshelf?”

Texas - whose skill either in psychic animal husbandry or cold reading still makes him exceptional among horses, who often aren’t capable of either - replied to say that no, Splattercat actually didn’t suffer whatsoever from being violently taken out of this world by his owner’s wayward home furnishings. In fact, he died because he felt it was his Time To Go, leaving no resentment or ill will towards his owner and her Ikea egregiousness whatsoever. Texas also informed her that Splattercat had actually chosen to reincarnate as an Egyptian Abyssinian shorthair, and was living out his life peaceably, far away from his previous owner and her neglect worthy of at least a home visit by the RSPCA.

all of which is amazing, because in the course of ONE letter, you get unequivocal suggestion that the following things are definitely real:

  • zoonotic telepathy
  • necromancy
  • reincarnation
  • the ability of animals to foretell their own death and go to it with all the vim and vigor of leo in Titanic when he decided he couldn’t bear to be with rose any longer and let the sea take him, presumably so he could reincarnate as a tabby instead

[mad world starts playing]

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